Monday, December 27, 2004

Quote Of The Day

Quote to ponder:

"Mentors have a way of seeing more of our faults than we would like. It's the only way we grow."

---Padmé Amidala (in 'Attack Of The Clones')

Monday, December 20, 2004

X-mas In A Handbasket

A summary of my Christmas gifts bought so far:

20 Candles

2 DVDs

2 DVD Box Sets

1 Movie Quiz Board game/DVD combination

2 CDs

3 Boxes of chocolate

$80 in scratch tickets

2 picture frames (with pics)

3 Perfume/lotion gift sets

2 $40 gift certificates

2 crystal-like-etched image thingies (I don't really know what the hell they are)

..... and my balls up in a debt tree.

Sunday, December 19, 2004


Thought Of The Day:

When the coroner in a small town dies, who hauls his body away?

Wednesday, December 8, 2004


imagine there's no heaven

it's easy if you try

no hell below us

above us only sky

imagine all the people

living for today

imagine there's no countries

it isn't hard to do

nothing to kill or die for

and no religion too

imagine all the people

living life in peace

you may say i'm a dreamer

but i'm not the only one

i hope someday you'll join us

and the world will live as one

imagine no possessions

i wonder if you can

no need for greed or hunger

a brotherhood of man

imagine all the people

sharing all the world

you may say i'm a dreamer

but i'm not the only one

i hope someday you'll join us

and the world will live as one

---"Imagine" by John Lennon

Twenty-four years ago today, John was shot four times in the back on the sidewalk of his own home. He died two hours later. He was 40.

We miss you, John.

Tuesday, December 7, 2004

Frustration Station

Why is it that everything always seems to go wrong simultaneously? It's as if really bad days are written in the journal of the near future. Today it was my car. It has been messed up for weeks... no dome lights, an auto-reseting clock, suddenly losing my radio... that I can get by on temporarily. Tonight on my way home from work, it starts jerking when I change gears. It did the same thing last year, and I had to get it "power flushed". I'm not even too sure what that means, but all I know is I don't have the money for it right now (damn Christmas presents!). So tommorow I am going to skip work and try to get my car worked on. I'll borrow money from my parents if I have to (and then pay them back of course on payday). I just hope it's not too serious, or else I very well might be shopping around for a different one later this month.

Though I was incredibly distraught throughout the evening, things got a bit better when I found out a good friend of mine, Rob, was in town. I hadn't seen him for a few years, so I went to catch up with him and his family. It's still hard to imagine my once closest friend now with a wife and two daughters. Oh and did I mention he's younger than me by about a year?! Things seem to be going well for him which is great of course. We still talked video games passionately like we always did, and it was like a wave of nostalgia crashing over me. It's something I miss. Unfortunately, things are different now. He has family, he has priorities, and we don't live that close to each other anymore. Things change, that's why you should enjoy the good times while they last.

I must admit one thing though... I may not want to have children of my own, but watching his little daughters playing somehow gave me a desire to rethink that for an instant.

Anyway, as you can see I've added my most recent pic here now! I'd prefer to move it to my profile, but I'm having trouble publishing it there. So for awhile, I'll just keep it here. At least now I know how to post images, and I'll be sharing new and/or relevant pics as they apply. :)


"You live in a box. I could lift the lid... let some light in."

---Sara Deever (in 'Sweet November')

Rob & me @ his wedding on July 31st, 1999

Monday, December 6, 2004

Thursday, December 2, 2004

Alive in '05

Well it's that time of year again. Time to save up your money so you can spend it all on other people. Time to plan out your weekends to figure out how much shopping to do. Time to go to the liquor store to buy plenty of "stress-reducing spirits". Hey, when they say "we all should be in the holiday spirit", now you know what they're referring to. Oh and best of all, it's time once again to get presents!! Yay! I love presents. I can't wait to find out what I might get this year. Will it finally be those things I truly want? I mean, I know I always ask for a Charlize Theron, but I have still yet to get one. And how about a social life? I've always wanted one of those. Or eleventy billion dollars; that's what I could use. C'mon people, this is the time of year for giving... so give me your life savings and I'll give you thanks.

But this coming year, with my luck, I expect to get those things less desirable instead... like excessive liver damage, sexual frustration, intense societal dismay, and perhaps a stocking full of VD.

My pre-New Year's resolutions list is already blossoming into a full fledged assault. It seems each new day my mind thinks up one more way in which I need to improve. I guess that's just part of growing, and in a way I'm glad I do that. It keeps me always striving to be a better person, and not just a cornball jackoff all the time. Today's "note to self": be more confident. Maybe I could if I weren't so fucking stupid.

My week is oddly going well. Work always sucks, but somehow it seems to be flying by this week. I get paid tomorrow which is good, because now I can spend my whole check on rent and Christmas presents. I'm honestly looking forward to buying people stuff. I actually enjoy that. I've also been selling a few things on ebay lately. This is all part of that "downsize my life" project that will carry over well into next year (one of the major resolutions). I will be more specific about my resolutions as they come up throughout the year, but for now I'll just give you a glimpse of what might be in store for me in 2005 (for those of you who actually care): much improved guitar skills, better upper-body build, permanently applied body ink, a surgery or two, confidence boosting mind-set, promiscuity, two+ vacations, more sleep, less worry, more blog posting :), more concerts, expanded music variety and library, improved intellect, make new friends, reconnect broken ties to certain things that made me happy as a kid, and most importantly...more fun!

Where to start? I have my ideas. In fact, many are already in the works. One more month left to go until it's time to show myself what I can do.

2005 will be mine... oh yes, it will be mine. *sadistic grin*